Happy Sunday.

I’m opening all the windows, listening to jazz, cooking oatmeal with wild blueberries, and thinking a lot. Here’s what about.

TRYING NEW THINGS

When was the last time you tried something new?

I recently started a new job and have been thinking a lot about the experience of beginning. It’s funny because, I think that most people go through the day just trying to look cool and act like they know what they are doing. We like to be in situations where we feel calm, confident, and in control. We don’t want to be the kid carrying their lunch tray through the cafeteria with no where to go. I apologize if I’ve triggered memories long since repressed. The point is that we learn from a young age to pretend that we know what we are doing all the time. And then we grow up and realize that adults do this too, that everyone does this.

But it is, of course, a flawed plan. For the truly wonderful and rewarding things in life often require you to begin somewhere as someone who doesn’t know anything. Starting school, moving to a new city, becoming a parent. Trying out, applying, and really, just showing up. That’s the real test right? Saying “Okay, this is going to feel awkward and uncomfortable and I’m going to make a lot of mistakes, but I’m going to do it anyway”. You have to accept that you are putting yourself into a situation where you will not know what you are doing. And that’s scary as hell because it makes you vulnerable. And we hate being vulnerable. We think we don’t, but we do. If you can overcome that, if you can sit in the discomfort and let it you break you down in order to allow you to grow, you can do anything. I really believe that.

THE ALONENESS OF CHANGE

I was also thinking about how much aloneness is involved in being young. You are constantly moving around, changing classes, jobs, apartments, roommates, etc. You are perpetually in new situations with new people and while that can be super fun and interesting, it can also be a very solitary experience. And not even in a bad way, but just in a true way. You have yourself. You (probably) don’t have a life parter or a family or a stable career yet. You are just you. And I think that’s really beautiful and special. It’s pretty sacred, actually. For there are plenty of times in life where you will not have the time to simply sit on the beach by yourself and be twenty. I think about that all the time. For as eager as I am to experience more of life and to keep moving and growing, I am also incredibly aware of how special and rich this time really is. It’s not just a stepping stone, it’s the world as I know it today. I will know a different world tomorrow, next month, and next year. It won’t ever be just the same. That’s the whole point right? That’s the whole big, beautiful deal.

I think I really love that.

JOIN THE FUN

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